Flight of the Conchords is Back

Submitted for your approval, the premiere of season 2 of Flight of the Conchords:

Season 2 Online Premiere - Flight of the Conchords (US Only) - watch more funny videos

Like a greenish card? You mean like a library card?

LOST SNEAK PEAK!

Over the summer I signed up for this Dharma Initiative thing ABC was doing to pump up fans for the fifth season of "Lost." It was pretty lame at first, but just last week, it was turned over to Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse as a place for them to share stuff with fans before they hit the web en mass. The first big spoiler came today as a scene from Season 5 was sent out to those on the email list. (NOTE: READ NO FURTHER IF YOU WANT TO WAIT UNTIL JAN. 21 FOR LOST TO RETURN ON ABC) The scene shows Kate and Aaron, happily at home when there's a knock on the door. Kate goes to answer it and is greeted by a lawyer and some other silent dude telling her they have a court order for her to have a blood test to determine if she's Aaron's actual mother. Kate refuses to let them in and the lawyer refuses to reveal his client, so Kate tells them they need the Sherrif to get her out of her house. When they leave, she rushes upstairs, packs a bag, money, and a gun and tells Aaron they're going on vacation. Dun-dun-duuunnnnn! The clip will hit the rest of the web in 48 hours, so be sure to look for it then!

Jon adds:

Here's the video:



I think the most interesting and obvious question this raises is who hired the lawyers. My first instinct is Ben or Widmore, since they're the only people with the means and a tendancy towards manipulation. Of the two, it seems to me that Ben actually has more to gain by making Kate want to run. If he's looking for a reason to make her want to go back to the island, then this seems like a good one. Actually, the more I think about it, the less upside I can see for Widmore to be behind it. Just one and a half months!

You Won't Get This From Any Other Guy

Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends is one of those great shows that I don't really talk about too much. This is because I am at least nominally a grown-up and, as such, it isn't okay for me to watch cartoons. But make no mistake, Foster's is one of the sharpest and funniest shows on TV - smarter than anything Cartoon Network shows during the day and almost anything on Adult Swim (or most live action shows for that matter). Of course the kids still love it enough for Foster's to have its own float at the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, which they showed at a moment when I just happened to be watching. All of this is to preface this clip, which stars the Foster's float. Even if you are not a fan of the show, watch it and we'll reconvene afterwards:



Yeah, that's right. That is who you think it is. Now, I think we can agree to retire this joke knowing that it can never be done this well again. If you want to experience the awesomeness of the show itself you can watch the brand new movie on Saturday morning at 11:30 on Cartoon Network. Cartoons on Saturday morning? That's crazy talk!

Now if you need me, I'll be reading Proust and listening to Phillip Glass while drinking a fine wine from Bordeaux.

30 Rocks

This is pretty awesome:

"I'm the boss Lemon, you count the rocks."

Heroes - A Letter To Tim Kring

In lieu of a Heroes recap, here is a letter to the show's creator, Tim Kring.

Dear Tim Kring,

Two years ago, your show was the most compelling drama on TV. Lost was in its season long funk, 24 had started getting too far fetched, and everything else was crap. But here was your smart, fast paced show that kept me hooked, dying to know how to stop an exploding man or find out who Linderman was. Even the more annoying characters that didn't tie into the show's main plot were fun to see each week. Here, you had the perfect synthesis of comic books, Lost-like mystery, and family drama.

Then came Season 2. It was not good, but with the writer's strike impeding the show from hitting its stride, I looked the other way, deciding to wait for another full season and hope there'd be a return to form.

Unfortunately for me an scores of other fans, this was not to be. Instead, we've been treated to a season that is inconsistent within episodes, that has too many, often far fetched, threads to follow, and that has taken even the most lovable characters and made them hard to swallow, if they're even seen at all.

What's going on? Did the strike mess up your creative juice? Did you not have enough time to come up with a better plot? Or was Heroes a one-season wonder?

The first big issue to me seems to be that too much is going on. The Patrelli family war is clearly the main story, but why then are Claire and HRG (who's barely been there) bickering? Why do Sylar and Elle jump all over the board as far as if they're good or bad? Why has Daphne's story been so rushed, with Parkman falling for her too fast? Why is Mohinder still relevant? And most importantly, why the hell is Hiro 10 years old?!

I understand that the theme of this season is villains and that the idea is to make each character morally ambiguous so that we don't know who the true heroes and villains are, but maybe it's time to make one explicit or to kill someone off. There's too much going on, and much of it isn't worth caring about. Take a page from Lost or Season One and make one episode about one thread and move on. "Company Man" is the best episode you've done, but we haven't yet seen a comparable episode.

Furthermore, the likable characters are either annoying or non-existent. Peter started off as being super optimistic and bright, and now he's angsty. He can see the harsh realities of the world without being all emo. Also, pick a side for Sylar. He's fantastic as a villain or a good guy, but having him bounce back and forth takes the depth away from his character. HRG too has been gone for the whole season and when he as appeared, it's been sparingly. Fix that.

Lastly, there are too many threads that have been snapped off. What happened to Monica? Is Peter's Irish Lass still stuck in the future? Adam just got killed off before he could do anything. Even a character I despised, Maya, was simply sent home.

I think if these things get fixed, the show is salvageable. It's no longer the cultural phenomenon it was in its first season, but keep in mind, the same thing happened to Lost, albeit to a lesser degree. If you take a page out of there play book and start writing for the fans instead of NBC, maybe you'll get a little bit better response. I hope that helps.

I want to close by saying, I do love the show. It's just frustrating me.

Sincerly,

Michael of Television Rules the Nation

P.S.
I'm currently looking for a job in TV after I graduate in May, so if you liked my ideas and want me to come help the show, I'm available!

Updates

So I've kind of disappeared from the blog for a while, but I'm going to make up for it this week. With school weighing me down, I haven't had a much of a chance to post, so I'm making up for it this week with special recaps of all of the shows I've been neglecting to cover: Entourage, The Office, 30 Rock, and Heroes. TV may be going on a break this week, but I'm coming off of mine, so stay tuned. (In the meantime, enjoy that screenshot above with my favorite Entourage joke ever)

24: Redemption

Its been 18 months since we last saw Jack Bauer, but even if the writer's strike hadn't put off season seven by a year the show would be at a crossroads. Season six was an unqualified disappointment, with the show relying on lazy, repetitive plot points like Jack's magic torture abilities and the Terrorists' inexplicable urge to attack only LA. Add to this a year-long hiatus and a nation that has just rejected en masse the kind of worldview put forth by 24 and suddenly, a show that once seemed relevant and edgy finds itself fighting for viewers.

Which brings us to Redemption, 24's attempt to remind us that it exists. The movie is a prequel to the seventh season that didn't get made until after the strike and a significant portion of the season had been filmed, which explains the thrown-together feel this movie had. It also wanted to deal with a BIG ISSUE, in this case child soldiers in Africa. This is a horrible horrible thing, which means that if, like me, your first thought upon seeing the first scene was that this episode would finally answer the question "how many 8-year-olds could Jack Bauer take in a fight," then you are a bad person.

So my dream of an epic battle between Jack Bauer and an army of small children was not to be. But what happened? Not a whole lot. Jack has spent the year since season six going in hiding, because apparently America decided this whole torture thing wasn't working for it. This led Jack to the glorious nation of Africa where he finds himself volunteering at a school for kids led by The Full Monty's Robert Carlisle. A weasly US ambassador finds Jack and serves him with a Congressional subpeona but, like Harriet Meirs, Alberto Gonzales, and Karl Rove, Jack decides to dodge it by rescuing innocent kids from being forced to become cannon fodder for a brutal general's attempt at a coup. A couple of action scenes and a lot of running later, and Jack finds himself on a helicopter back to America since WUSA wouldn't let the kids escape without forcing Jack to follow the rule of law (what a slimeball!). In all honesty, it was unrealistically petty of WUSA not to let the kids out of the country without Jack. But, of course, not even WUSA could match the evilness of the UN Ambassador. Yes, he mocks Jack in the beginning. Of course he runs and hides when the evil soldiers come for the kids. And, as the UN Charter dictates, he defines "neutrality" as selling out Jack and the kids to the bad guys. If this is how the show is planning on being relevant in Obama's America, then it may have some issues.

In more promising news, Cherry Jones is the President! That should make up for her getting replaced by Meryl Streep in the film version of Doubt. She clashes with the old President Powers Boothe (did Wayne Palmer die last season? I thought he made it, but I guess not). I remembered Powers as being a crazy warmonger, but apparently the writers have been watching Heroes, because he suddenly decides not to commit troops to this particular war, despite President Cherry's objections. Her son, meanwhile, gets involved in some kind corporate conspiracy involving the evil Jon Voight, who is funding the coup. There wasn't a lot of juicy movement with these plots, but I imagine they'll come back into play next season.

Speaking of next season, despite my misgivings about this episode, I'm still looking forward to the season proper. I think moving to Washington D.C. is a great change for the show. Hopefully, they seem to be moving away from all the torture too. And, while bringing Tony back from the dead definitely reeks of shark-jumping, the show is best when Jack has a personal stake in what's going on.

But none of that makes up for the fact that the movie basically just spent two hours spinning its wheels. At the most basic level, it succeeded in reminding me that 24 is still on the air and is coming back soon. But as an actual episode of the show, it was pretty boring. Hopefully, this won't be a harbinger of the upcoming season.

C

Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia - "The Night Man Cometh"

And so after 13 episodes, we have come to the long-awaited The Night Man Cometh, a rock opera as epic as Tommy and as dorkily complex as The Wall. It truly is a show that will define a generation of theatergoers.

So perhaps I'm overstating it. All in all, this was a solidly funny episode that was saddled with some unrealistic expectations; between being the season finale, reviving one of the show's best jokes, and being unintentionally forced to save a weak season it seems as if the burden "Night Man" had to carry was somewhat excessive. That being said there was a lot to like, from the distinctively Sunny homonym joke about the Night Man's desire to enter "that boy's hole" to Charlie's directoral power-tripping.

However, it all felt a little thrown together. The musical itself felt rushed and somewhat unfulfilling, with most of the good jokes having been given away relatively far in advance. I also feel like it was missing one or two truly classic Sunny moments.

But why dwell on the negative when there's so much more here than in most of what we've gotten this season. All in all its been a long, tedious, and disappointing march from Charlie screaming "Wild Card!!!" to Mac's wondering who the musical was versus. In between, there hasn't been much to reward those of us who first came on impressed by the show's comic inventiveness, free-wheeling feel, and ability to shock. While "Night Man" succeeded as an individual episode, it didn't seem like the kind of course reversal the show needs. Ideally, the season would have ended with an episode strong enough to make it seem like the rest of the season has been some kind of aberration. Instead, it seems like these good ones may become more and more unusual.

B+

Television Rules the Nation Theater Presents: "Ben Silverman Doesn't Have to Explain Himself to You!!!"

The following may not be suitable for Television Rules the Nation's younger readers. Once again, with apologies to Kissing Suzy Kolber

Ben Silverman sits in his office in a chair that's made of real gold. He wears the finest silks and sips from a diamond chalice. A loop of Ugly Betty and The Office airs on a 200 in. flat-screen TV on the wall.



Ben: Being Ben Silverman is delightful! Oh Joan!



Christina Hendricks enters

Christina: For the last time Mr. Silverman, that's a character I play. My name is Christina Hendricks. I'm an actor. I'm here to audition for a part on The Off-

Ben: Joan, bring me more Yoo-Hoo! Ben Silverman is thirsty! And see if my 1:30 is here.

Christina: You don't understand! I'm not your secretary! NBC can't afford a secretary for you because your highest rated show this season was the Barack Obama infomercial.

Ben: That will be all Joan.

Christina: Arrrgh!

Christina Hendricks exits. As she leaves, she passes Tina Fey



Tina: Hey Big Ben! What can I do for you?

Ben: Ah Tina. Thanks for coming. Sit down.

Tina looks around for a place to sit down, but there's only one chair

Tina: I'll just stand. So, I was wondering if I could talk to you about increasing 30 Rock's budget. We have this awesome joke where Tracy throws Kenneth and Keith Olbermann out of the 32nd story window, but they land on a giant bounce house-

Ben: Yeah, that's gold! But listen, Tina. Times are tough here at NBC. (Sips from diamond chalice) We can only do Green Week so many times before people realize that we're just keeping the lights off 16 hours a day to save electricity costs.

Tina: But you've got this massive TV screen that shows nothing but Ugly Betty and The Office.

Ben: BEN SILVERMAN DOESN'T HAVE TO EXPLAIN HIMSELF TO YOU!!!

Tina: Okay, I-

Ben: THOSE ARE THE TWO BEST AND MOST ORIGINAL SHOWS ON TV AND GUESS WHO CAME UP WITH THEM??? DID YOU???

Tina: No, I think they were created in other countries by-

Ben: THAT'S RIGHT. BEN SILVERMAN DID. (A pause while Ben collects himself. He sips from his chalice) Aaah. That's better. Now Tina, no offense, but your show's going downhill fast. We at NBC need winners. Shows like Lipstick Jungle and My Own Worst Enemy. Now, while your show hasn't come anywhere near those two masterpieces, its not bad. I just think there are a few improvements we can make.

Tina: Well, we tried putting guest stars in every episode like you said, but I think that's-

Ben: Don't worry about that anymore. I've got a new idea that reflects that Silverman-genius that has become the standard here at NBC. YOU CAN COME IN NOW!

A panel on the wall lifts up as steam from dry ice pours out. Strobe lights begin flashing and out comes Sarah Palin

Tina: Oh no.



Sarah: Oh yes you sexist Northeastern liberal. I'm back!

Tina: I didn't realize you had left.

Ben: Now, Tina. Ben Silverman has been thinking. And he has decided to add Sarah Palin to the cast of 30 Rock.

Tina: What!?! This is ridiculous? You can't tell us what to do.

Ben: Shut up! I tricked you into adding all that sweet, sweet product placement, didn't I? How else was I going to pay for this chalice. (Sips from chalice)

Tina: Well, I'm drawing a line here. There's no way I'm putting Sarah Palin on my show.

Sarah: Now, let's just calm down and enjoy some of these fine mooseburgers. (She winks.)

Ben: I can never say no to a mooseburger.

Tina: Sure. Whatever.

Sarah distributes the mooseburgers

Sarah: Aren't those just the most scrumptidlious things you've ever tasted? (She winks.)

Tina: These actually aren't bad.

Sarah: Tina, do you mind if we have a quick pow-wow for just an eensy, teeny tiny second. (She winks)

Tina: I guess.

Sarah approaches and gets up in Tina's grill

Tina: Governor Palin, you're kind of up in my grill.

Sarah: (Takes off her glasses and drops the folksy accent and mannerisms) Good. Now you listen to me you hipster trollop. I've spent 47 years trying to sate my unquenchable thirst for power and I almost made it. Now, I'm not about to be beaten by the likes of you.

Tina: But-

Sarah: Silence! Everything was going according to plan until you had to stick your obnoxious glasses and absurdist sense of humor into my election. We don't even look that similar!

Ben: That recurring dream I've been having for the last 3 months begs to differ.

Sarah: You ruined my career Tina Fey. So now I'm going to ruin your show. (Puts glasses and mannerisms back on) You betcha! (She winks).

Ben: That's not all. There's better news!

Tina: (wearily) What's that?

Ben: Well, Ben Silverman has not only been thinking, he's been reading. The ratings. And he's realized that people seem to love you. But they only love you when you play Sarah Palin. So starting now, Sarah is going to play Liz Lemon and you're going to play her long lost sister: Alaska Governor Sarah Palin.

Tina: But that doesn't make any sense. Lorne, talk him out of it.

In the corner of the office is Lorne Michaels. He has been there the entire time. He sits in front of a giant stack of money.



Lorne: What's that? Yeah, whatever you say Ben. Sounds good. (He returns to counting his money)

Tina: Why Ben Silverman? Why?

Ben: What did I just say!?! What did I just say!?! Lorne, tell her.

Lorne: Ben Silverman doesn't have to explain himself to you.

Ben: BEN. SILVERMAN. DOESN'T. HAVE. TO. EXPLAIN. HIMSELF. TO. YOU. When you create The Office AND Ugly Betty, you can sit in my SOLID GOLD CHAIR, wear THE FINEST SILKS IN THE LAND, sip FUCKING YOO-HOO FROM A DIAMOND CHALICE, and PUT SARAH PALIN IN MY SHOWS. (He exhales loudly and takes a sip from his chalice) But until that day comes, have fun making webisodes that promote American Express with your long lost twin sister over here. Now leave. And don't let Tim Kring in here on your way out!

Tina: I bet Mitch Hurwitz never had to go through this.

Tina and Sarah exit. Ben sits down triumphantly

Television Rules the Nation Theater Presents: "What About Tim Kring?"

The following scene is not suitable for our younger readers.

With apologies to Kissing Suzy Kolber

Bryan Fuller sits alone in his apartment. He looks over at the phone. Nothing. He checks his e-mail. Nothing.



Bryan: Oh Caroline, why won’t ABC talk to me anymore?



Caroline: Meowwwwww.

The phone rings. Bryan lunges at it.

Bryan: Hello! (Pause) No, I wouldn’t like to change my cell phone plan.

Suddenly a loud banging starts at the door.

Bryan: Who is it?

The banging continues.

Bryan: I’m coming!

Suddenly there’s a loud smash and the door explodes. Shards of wood fly everywhere. Appearing in the debris is Tim Kring. He chews gum, causing his teeth to smack together very loudly.



Tim Kring: What’s up, bra? Its me. Tim Kring.

Bryan: Yes, I know its you. You don’t have to explain everything like I was stupid.

Tim: I’m just making sure you get what’s going on here. How’s your pussy show going?

Bryan: You mean Pushing Daisies.

Tim: Yeah, that’s the shit.

Bryan: Its going fine.

Tim: Really, cuz that’s not what I heard. They cancelled it yet?

Bryan: I don’t know, I haven’t heard anything yet!

Tim: Well, that’s too bad. You know, if you want to come work on a REAL, MANLY TV show, we could always find some space for you at Heroes.

Bryan: I already said I’d think about going back if Pushing Daisies got canceled.

Tim: Oh, really? Well, hang on one sec.

Tim pulls out an iPhone and begins tapping rapidly. Then he stops.

Tim: Guess what, I just used all the clout I have from writing one of TVs most popular shows to get your little baby show cancelled!

Bryan: No you didn’t. Our shows are on totally different networks.

Tim: Yeah, but my show has something your gay little show doesn’t. VIEWERS!!!! So why don’t you take your water colors out of your vagina and come work on a TV show where shit EXPLODES!

Bryan: I don’t really understand what you just-

Tim: SHUT UP YOU WORDY DOUCHENOZZLE! EVER SINCE YOU’VE LEFT ITS ALL ‘WHERE’S BRYAN FULLER? WHY DOES HEROES SUCK?’ I’M SICK OF THIS BULLSHIT.

This rant causes Tim to spit his gum out. It hits Caroline who begins rolling around on the floor in the most adorable way imaginable.

Bryan: Is everything okay, Tim?

Tim: Now you want to talk about my feelings??? WELL FUCK YOU FULLER! AND FUCK YOUR PIXIE SHOW! Just because you can write witty characters with real emotions everyone thinks you’re a genius? WELL WHAT ABOUT TIM MOTHERFUCKING KRING? I created HEROES AND CROSSING JORDAN!!

Bryan: Look, as long as Pushing Daisies is on the air, I’m not coming to work on Heroes.

Tim: WELL YOU CAN LICK MY NUTS, FUCKSTICK!

Tim rushes towards Bryan. Bryan kicks Tim in the shin. He fails to floor writhing in pain

Tim: (sobbing a little) Why, Fuller? Why!?! That hurts. Damnit! I need some of that cheerleader’s blood! Stat!

Enter Sylar



Bryan: What is this?

Tim: (still on the floor) That’s right dipshit. The tables have fucking turned. If you won’t come to work for me then I'll just have Sylar here kill you and take your writing ability.

Sylar: Um…actually Tim, I’m good now. Remember?

Tim: Well, I need you to be evil again. So take your pointy ears and large forehead and start eating some brains!

Sylar: I don’t eat brains!!!!

Bryan: Then what do you do?

Sylar: I…um…I…Tim what do I do?

Tim: Well he…You know, he…It involves…WHAT DOES IT MATTER??? HE’S A FUCKING SERIAL KILLER WITH GODDAMN SUPERPOWERS!!!

Sylar: But I’m trying to redeem myself!

Tim: Yeah, but not now. I need you to EVIL SOME SHIT UP!!!

Sylar: But…that doesn’t make any sense?

Tim: What do you mean?

Sylar: There’s no logic to that. That’s not how people work.

Tim: I don’t follow.

A long pause as Tim considers this

Bryan: (sighs) That’s okay Tim. That’s okay.

Bryan walks over and helps Tim up. Tim walks over and joins Sylar and the two of them start to leave.

Sylar: I’ll buy you a new door Bryan.

Tim: That’s okay. I’ll just go back in time and stop the door from being smashed! Or we can heal it with Claire’s blood! Or the pieces of the door can be sent off to separate places around the world and then spend 11 episodes trying to reunite with each other!

Tim and Sylar exit. Bryan looks over at Caroline

Bryan: Please let Pushing Daisies stay on the air.

Caroline: Meowwwwwww!

THE END

News ranging from awesome to depressing

Lots of interesting TV tidbits this week, ranging from stories that induce expletives of joy, to ones that induce expletives of severe anger.

Let's start with the mind-blowingly good news: DON DRAPER MAY BE COMING TO 30 ROCK. Yes, according to Ausiello at EW, Jon Hamm may be joining the show for a multi-episode arc as a love interest for Liz Lemon. What have we done right to deserve this?

Also exciting is the announcement that Reiko Aylesworth, who played Michelle on 24 for a while, is coming to Lost, which, while we're on the topic, is coming back with a two hour premiere on Wednesday, January 21. Mark your calenders/DVRs.

But alas, all is not well in TV land. One of the finest shows on TV perches on the edge of cancellation and things look bleaker for it by the day. The silver lining? PD overseer Bryan Fuller said in an interview that if the show is canceled, he'd come back to work for Heroes. Fuller wrote for Heroes in season one (the good season) and was responsible for Company Man, which is pretty easily the best hour that show has ever produced. Of course, I'd rather have more Pushing Daisies (and I'm beginning to think that Heroes may be beyond fixing), but its good to know that Fuller will have something to do should the worst happen.

But the worst news of all may be about a show that hasn't even debuted yet. Fox announced their January schedule and among the news was the fact that Dollhouse will be moving to Fridays along with ratings challenged Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles. Dollhouse is the new Joss Whedon TV show and, after seeing Fox mistreat Firefly, its not very reassuring to see them give Dollhouse the exact same timeslot, a time which is normally death for TV shows. Add to that the fact that Dollhouse scraped its pilot and shot a new one (just like Firefly) and I'm beginning to get the feeling that this show may not last more than six episodes.

Gossip Girl - "There Might Be Blood"

Finally we get a week off from the Chuck and Blair show and I've got to say that this was probably one of the strongest episodes in a while.

I thought that the central storyline, involving Jenny's efforts to stage a guerilla fashion show (and not, as I had hoped, a gorilla fashion show), was reasonably compelling. The Jenny-Nate-Vanessa triangle is shockingly compelling and Jenny's bubbly, destructive self-absorption can be interesting when used in the right way.

After last week, Nate and Jenny aren't talking (apparently Jenny also forgot that even she was creeped out by Weird Model In Need of Acting Lessons) and Jenny's been working on a secret project: the aforementioned act of fashion terrorism (speaking of fashion terrorism, I didn't mention Jenny's awful new haircut or equally ugly outfit last week, but both seemed to improve this go around). Jenny, with the help of WMINOAL's sketchy friends, busted up a gala event honoring Lilly and Bart.

To be honest, everything before and after the fashion show worked, but I had a couple of issues with the event itself. First of all, I didn't find it nearly as awesomely rebellious as the show seemed to (and a note to Jemina Pearl and Thurston Moore: nice try, but no). Is it really that punk rock to bust up a party like that if your stated goal is to get funding? Shouldn't she have been trying to say something a little deeper than "pay me?" I also didn't like that everyone seemed to love it. If everyone loved it then the stakes are dramatically lower and there's no real consequence to her actions? And aren't these supposed to be old, boring people? No one was bothered by this?

That said, I thought the ending kinda redeemed this. Rufus' poor parenting and Jenny's refusal to care about anything but Jenny make for some interesting conflict. Its hard to say who's worse off at the end of the episode, but I'm going to go with Jenny, just because running off to live with WMINOAL is only ending in tears.

Meanwhile, Blair faced off against a mini-Blair (who reads Gossip Girl obsessively but hadn't seemed to have heard of Blair) in order to get on the good side of someone who can get her into Yale. The girl is determined to have her cherry popped before her friend Muffy, but Blair needs to stop her from doing that. Blair succeeds, thanks to an assist from Chuck who plants a fake story about Muffy on Gossip Girl. It was a pretty slight plot, but it gave Blair the chance to finally get catty again and we also saw a really nice moment of humanity in the end. Again, I felt kind of let down that Blair didn't end up blackmailing her way into Yale (because how perfect would that have been), but nonetheless it looks like she and Serena will be classmates. I also thought it was interesting, considering how both Blair and Jenny alluded to her, that Eleanor was absent. Given how her real daughter may have just opened up some previously untapped feelings and her fake daughter just declared fashion war in the New York Times, I would be kind of disappointed if we don't hear from her next week.

In other news, Dan judged Nate and, more interestingly, was inspired by his failure to connect with Yale professors and Jenny's rebellion to write the Chuck Bass Story - a move that I whole-heartedly support. Rufus didn't approve, but I'd say there's a difference between publicly airing out the tawdry affairs of Chuck, who has never been anything but obnoxious to Dan, and what Jenny did. And I think its better if Dan doesn't always do the "right" thing. Meanwhile, in the night's only plotline that didn't connect for me, Serena continued to try to connect with her Creepy Ex-Husband (seriously, you would have to change very few details of this storyline to make it fit on South Park). Serena, here's a bit of free advice: if you try to speak to or call someone three times and each time you end up talking to a different girl, the guy you are dealing with is sleazy. Ah, but young Serena finds his douchey advances irresistable, so we will be treated to another week of CEH.

Still, those are but small concerns for an episode that was otherwise pretty good. And on a week like this, I'm willing to let a few small things go.

B+

Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia - "The Gang Cracks the Liberty Bell"

Sorry things have been quiet around here, apparently there was some kind of national vote or something? Anyway, I'll have my Gossip Girl review up soon, and next week I'm hoping to pick up Pushing Daisies to replace Mad Men (tear). So anyway, with that out of the way onto the review!

I've been reading Sarah Vowell's new book, The Wordy Shipmates, which is all about the Puritans. One of the early essays is about what happens when sitcoms try to present very special episodes about American history (classics include The Brady Bunch and Happy Days, both of which did Thanksgiving episodes). So it seems somewhat appropriate that this week's Sunny carries on that grand tradition. Unfortunately, it also carries on this season's tradition of not being very funny.

Vowell's essay is partially about how difficult it is to enjoy these kinds of episodes once you know a lot about history. I admit that I ran into this problem, specifically with all the Sweet Dee is a witch jokes. Maybe its just me, but I've never associated witch hysteria with Revolution-era Philly, almost a hundred years after the Salem panic of 1692. The slave jokes also felt a little weird to me. However, I almost wonder if they were making fun of the way sitcoms tend to play history as broad as possible when they do concept episodes like this. Perhaps they were driving at some sort of meta-commentary on the sitcom form in general? Or (and I think this is more likely) they were just making fun of Dennis, Charlie, and Mac - the tellers of the story - for being total idiots.

The rest of the episode doesn't really seem to support either thought. Instead, Mac and Dennis are up to their usual schenanigans; trying to get on the good side of British General Rickety Cricket. Cricket falls for Dee, who is uninterested until he promises her lots of money and an English manor. Meanwhile, Charlie and Frank end up with a bunch of guns that don't work.

I had hoped that the reason why the last few episodes were weak was they had been so focused on making this concept episode awesome. At the very least, I thought this episode might break the pattern of saminess that has made the last few episodes so bland. Ultimately, however, this felt just as paint by numbers as the rest of them; they just used a different brush. The jokes were a little better, especially Rickety Cricket getting his head blown off, but it still wasn't nearly as funny as seasons 1-3. Even the aforementioned head-blowing-off wasn't nearly as much of a showstopper as it should have been.

So what's happening here? How did a show that was once so funny become so tedious to sit through? I think its problem may be that its lost a bit of its freewheeling edginess. This show has always been best when its been plugging horrible, horrible issues into sitcomy contexts. And mocking "the historical episode" seems like the perfect way to do that. Yet here was none of the subversiveness that has marked the show's best moments. Instead, it feels like each episode draws the show closer to redundant shtick, be it Frank's scheming, Dennis and Dee's vapidity, or Charlie's Charlieness. We've definitely hit some kind of wall here, and if cracking the Liberty Bell won't get us over it then I don't know what will.

C+

Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia - "Sweet Dee Has A Heart Attack"

More like Its Always SLUMPY In Philadelphia, amiright?????? (Raises hand for high 5).

But seriously, folks, this show has been off in a big way this season. I didn't blog about last week, but it was not very good. And this week was equally bleak. I'm not quite clear what's happening here. Maybe they are focused more on the big, gimmicky late episodes like next week's 1776 one, or the upcoming Night Man extravaganza. Or maybe they've simply found their formula and are just running with it. But whatever's going on, Sunny needs a course correction and fast.

So, after Dee has a heart attack, the whole gang takes a quick stop at the hospital, where they find out they don't have health insurance (or in Charlie and Mac's case, that health insurance is a requirement to receive care). So, after being treated to a little Danny DeVito ass, the gang splits into their separate stories. Dee and Dennis decide to go to the gym to get in shape, which just felt like a collection of jokes that they've done before. Meanwhile, Frank somehow ended up in an institution, acting out One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest (which I believe Danny DeVito had a part in). And Charlie and Mac went to work for a corporate office to get health care. I thought this plotline had a lot of potential, since the notion of those two in corporate America just seems hilarious. It also seemed like they were going to go in a somewhat satirical direction, with the world of corporations driving Charlie completely insane (incidentally, did Charlie learn how to read? Because he was able to tell who the letters were addressed to).

The biggest problem was that the comic setpieces all landed flat. There was nothing particularly memorable about the interview scene, or Dee and Dennis' fight with the instructor, or any of the shenanigans in the office. Before anything else, Sunny is a comedy, and when its not funny there's not much else to say.

C-

Gossip Girl - "Pret a Poor Jenny"

That was 45 minutes of my life I'm not getting back. Seriously, between the terrible acting, awful writing, and groaning attempts at both humor and serious message-making this episode was like the Olympics of Terrible.

Taking the bronze was Chuck and Blair, for what will hopefully be the conclusion of their will they-won't they storyline. At first, the idea of pairing Chuck and Blair was delightful, but its been THE SAME STORYLINE FOR FOUR WEEKS. However, this wasn't a complete failure for two reasons. First, I thought the idea of getting Dan involved in this storyline was a stroke of genius. It was nice to see him do the wrong thing for once too (although that being said, I disagree wholeheartedly with Serena and thought it was pretty shallow of her to dismiss what Blair and Chuck did to Vanessa). I also liked the resolution, largely because I agree with Chuck. The reason I've never fully been on the Blair/Chuck train is that getting them together just wouldn't work, either for them as characters or for the show as a whole. That being said, the scene on the rooftop was so cringe-inducingly terrible that I can't grade this storyline as good.

In the silver was Serena, who had her first post-Dan flirtation with an artist who wears thick frames that presumably have no lenses (that's how I will choose to explain the fact that he just takes them on and off at random). He seemed pretty bland to me until he asked out Serena, and then he came off extremely douchey. I get that he knew her earlier, but he wasn't being charming, he was just being a tool. Meanwhile, Dan and Serena are now friends again, so Dan can go back to not having scenes with any other character on the show.

But taking the gold this week was little J. Its not that I don't buy that she's that naive and impressionable (because I do. I really do). Its just that the whole good girl falls in with the wrong crowd thing is such a boring cliche. This show does a lot wrong, but by and large they've done a good job of not going for the easy storyline. The bad model was tired. The sketchy photographer dude was tired. And, honestly, since he didn't look any older than the actors who play Nate, Chuck, or Dan I never realized that he was supposed to be much older than Jenny. Speaking of Nate, the whole thing with him and Jenny really came out of nowhere, didn't it? Did they interact at all this season? Have I missed the clues because I'm not examining this show frame by frame, like Lost?

Ultimately there were enough little things to keep this episode from being the worst thing I've ever seen. But we spent far too much time wading into maudlin sentimentality and uptight moralizing; neither of which really fit well with a show this scandalous and amoral.

D+

The Office - "Employee Transfer"

Tonight's episode of "The Office" was a weird one. In one part, it was extremely human and emotional and in the other part, it was jokes that didn't quite land.

The best part of the entire episode was the Michael and Holly story. Holly was transfered from Scranton as a result of their relationship and Michael, with the aide of Darrell, was taking her to her new home. Unfortunately, she realized that it was too far and that there'd be no plausible way for them continue their relationship. In one of the saddest and more emotional moments the show has ever had, Michael decided that splitting up with Holly was the best decision for both of them. Their tearful goodbye pulled hard on the heartstrings and was the best example of why this show is so fantastic.

As for the rest of the cast, Jim and Pam were having lunch or dinner or some sort of meal with Jim's brothers and Pam thought it would be funny to pull a prank of Jim. Unfortunately, her idea wasn't funny enough for the other Halperts, and they instead pulled a lame prank where they insulted art majors (Ed.: I'm an art major...I ignore the whole money thing) and Jim got mad and then it just sort of ended.

In the office, Andy and Dwight were going at it Jim and Dwight style, with a combination of a prank done on both "30 Rock" and this show earlier. It sort of missed the mark as neither did anything that was hysterical. Again, the rest of the cast was sort of pushed aside to make room for Holly and Michael. Now that that has closure, I hope they all come back. I would love to see more Pam (LOVED the Charlie Chaplin bit). Let's hope they bounce back next week.

B-

EDITOR'S NOTE:
I reviewed tonight's "30 Rock" the other day, as it was online before it's air date. Scroll down or find "30 Rock" in the tags section to the right to read the review.

South Park - "Pandemic II: The Startling"

This week, the startling conclusion to last week's "The Startling", and let me just say, I was...less than startled. Less than amused, even.

Let me catch you up, if you were lucky enough to miss last week. Peruvian pan pipe bands are responsible for keeping giant guinea pigs at bay. An evil dude in the government rounded up all the pan pipe bands, and now the world is being overrun by giant guinea pigs.

Now let me recap the latest episode. There are also guinea bees, guinea spiders, etc., each one just a guinea pig dressed up in a costume. Also, the evil guy was a guinea pirate. Craig is the chosen one, and he saves the world.

Thats it. Thats all there was two both of the episodes. A continuation of this season's mediocrity. The only slightly redeeming part of these episodes was Craig's reflection on the crazy situations the boys always end up in. It was amusing to see one of the characters finally step back and say "No", recognizing the absurdity of it all, and suggesting that they simply walk away, pointing out that there is never a reason they HAVE to get involved. Other than that, this was a wholly disappointing effort by Stone and Parker.

D+

30 Rock - "Do Over"

SPOILER WARNING: The season premiere of "30 Rock" is available at NBC.com and Hulu ahead of it's airing on Thursday. If you haven't watched the episode yet, I'd advise waiting to read this.

The wait for the funniest show on television is finally over thanks to Hulu. With all the Emmy and SNL buzz for Tina Fey, I've been seriously jonesing for some TGS. This wasn't their greatest episode, but it was hilarious and brightened my very long day. For the most part, the gang has just barely moved on from where we left them. The Gay Bomb worked for Jack, getting him back to NBC to reclaim his job from Banks. Liz on the other hand was back on task to try to adopt, and Tracy had his porn video game finally finished.

With that, let's break it down. Liz was entertaining a crazy adoption lady played by an underused Megan Mullally of "Will and Grace" fame. Despite the fact that Liz cleaned up her apartment, it seemed like her co-workers were going to sabotage her chances. Fortunately for her, Bev suffered a head injury that allowed her to completely do her interview over again. One of the best moments of the episode of Frank's refusal at first to take off his "Horny" hat, but eventually changing it...for another hat that said "Horny." Sadly, Bev recovered and in the end, Liz needed to keep searching for a new adoption agency.

Jack was a little busy in "Do Over" as well trying to get back his job from the evil Devin Banks. Will Arnett was absolutely hilarious as a Devin gone crazy from stress and his marriage to Kathy Geiss. Jack, using his go-getting abilities, was quickly climbing his way up through the mail room when he discovered Kathy could give him his job back by sleeping with her. Turns out, luckily for him, that Kathy just wanted to live out her favorite soap operas. Jack played along, leading to a hilarious almost kiss with Liz.

The rest of the cast, Jenna, Kenneth, and Tracy were largely written off all episode. Jenna was angry that Tracy didn't pay her for her voice work on his porn game, leading to a little drama. Kenneth was hardly even there. These guys need to be pumped up as the season goes on, but for now, it's great to see Liz and Jack again.

B+

Alright, I'll post one more Mad Men parody

Because you guys asked so nicely:



You like cigarettes huh? Well here's all the cigarettes in the world!!!

LOST SEASON 5 TRAILER

Apologies for the all caps, but this is some exciting stuff: a new trailer for season 5 of Lost has just surfaced!!!



Obviously, there's nothing too concrete to take away from the trailer, but among the interesting things I noticed were a subliminal flash of the Dharma Initiative (while someone mysterious threatened the Losties with a gun; does Dharma survive or did Locke move the island backwards in time, and not forwards like I had been thinking?), a hand holding the compass that Richard Alpert showed to a young John Locke, and proof that Farraday lives. Also, everyone in the Oceanic Six gets more badass.

Speaking of Farraday, Noel Murray at the AV Club has an intriguing theory that Farraday may have gone to a different time when Ben moved the island, since he wasn't technically on the island when it happened. That could tie into the Farraday soundalike who showed up in this year's Comic-Con video. Is Daniel about to experience the Dharma purge firsthand? Is Radzinsky the guy in the Haz-Mat suit, as Doc Arzt suggests? Is Farraday Radzinsky????? (Probably not)

I've been trying to avoid reading anything too revealing about this season, but with Mad Men off the air, its nice to know my other obsession is lurking around the corner.

Mad Men - "Mediations in an Emergency"

It was a little over a year ago that Don Draper sold himself on the domestic fantasy promised by the wheel. This season has been largely about how that choice failed to satisfy either him or Betty. But after some soul-searching on the West Coast, he's come home.

Meanwhile, Betty's got what we've seen Pete and Trudy agonize over for a year: a baby on the way. And she can't handle it. So she goes horseback riding, and drinks, and smokes, and even considers taking a trip to Albany.

Its rare that these characters find themselves in a true life-or-death situation, but that's exactly where they are in "Meditations in an Emergency." The big emergency, of course, is the Cuban Missile Crisis. Mad Men can be criticized a lot for its somewhat winking inclusion of historical events and period trivia. But this was not one of those cases. It served as the perfect backdrop for the internal turmoil and arms races the characters were engaged in and really felt like something this season had been building towards.

Seeing Don return from L.A. was exciting and energizing, even if he was coming back to a world in chaos. The scene where Roger tells him they're selling the company was just so good. Roger coming close but not quite apologizing, Don coming close but not quite lashing out.

Meanwhile, his domestic world is also upside down, as Betty scorns him at the equestrian park. She does allow him to spend an evening with the children, setting up the reversal we've all seen coming. As Don spends a quiet night watching the children and arranging food for them, coming as close to being the domestic figure that we've ever really seen, Betty hits the town: drinking, smoking, and fucking. Was this a rebellion? An attempt to stop herself from making the choice she didn't want to make? Or did Betty want to get into the head of Don and see what its like to live his life? The news that she was pregnant was a sudden and surprising (to me, anyway) as Peggy's discovery last season (if not as dramatic) and it seemed to represent as much of a watershed moment for her. By accepting this baby, Betty has to climb back into the picture of suburban life she's found so unfulfilling. But the alternative doesn't seem any better.

At the office, Pete is forced to choose between the calculating career advancement that has so defined him, and his need for approval from his surrogate father figure. Its Don's (seemingly insincere) words of encourage that get the better of Duck's slimy ambition and, ultimately, Pete's neediness seems to have caused him to trip into making the right decision. The confidence it gave him led to his true moment of maturation, something to bookend the loss of his father earlier.

All season, we've seen Peggy struggle with her decision, and in an emergency, when they're told they are close to going to hell, people make crazy, impetuous decisions. Which is why I admire Peggy even more after this episode and its knockout penultimate scene between her and Pete. Finally, the truth comes out. Pete realizes he's made the wrong decision and wants Peggy to take him back. And Peggy offers everything that he's been missing: a compatible person who understands him and, of course, can have children with him. But Peggy made her choice and its gotten her more fulfillment and opened so many more doors for her. Peggy doesn't need to compromise on an awkward man-child and she doesn't regret not doing it earlier. Her message to Pete - it was never your choice, it was mine - was crushingly honest. It was emotional a moment that we've had on this show and I imagine Pete will be very different in season three.

Meanwhile, the climactic Don-Duck showdown was just amazing. Duck's obnoxious cockiness as he accepted the presidency of Sterling-Cooper and then proceeded to lay out a vision of bland corporate homogenization made his comeuppance that much sweeter. Duck sees creative as a bunch of sensitive, needy obstacles. His vision is of a world of numbers and dollars and cold efficiency, which makes it all the better that the one variable he missed was the trust and friendship between Don and Roger. Don's angry rebuke of Duck was amazing, and then the moment where he dropped the no contract bombshell was just perfect. By the end of that meeting, it was clear to Duck and the new buyers what's been clear to everyone since episode one: Don is Sterling Cooper.

So Don returns from a triumph at work to resume his dream life with Betty. And Betty accepts that life too, telling Don that she's pregnant with another child. But what's noticeable as they sit on the couch and watch TV is the space between them and the resigned expressions on their face.

This ending is not about trying to create your own memories, its about growing up and accepting what you have, however draining and empty it might be, because its your responsibility to do so. It seems cruel to end the season with so many open questions - what's next for Don and Betty, will everyone keep their jobs, where does Pete go from here - but then if we learned anything from this episode, its that we can't really understand what happens in an emergency until long after its over.

A

Don Draper on SNL

Hey everyone,

Mike and I have returned in one piece from the Big Apple. I'm still catching up on stuff, so its going to be a bit before my review of Mad Men is up. In the meantime, in case you missed it, here's two choice MM-related sketches from Jon Hamm's turn as SNL host.

First is a helpful guide on how to be like Don Draper:



They also did a straight MM parody, which I thought was almost perfect. I saw almost because I HATE the A-Holes. They're not funny at all and I think here they ruin an otherwise spot-on Mad Men parody. However, I especially enjoyed Will Forte's Pete and Casey Wilson's Joan. I'm not sure about that new girl they got to play Peggy, though...



Bonus Political Impressions:

From the Thursday show, the two best SNL political impressions of the last decade, side-by-side:

South Park - "Pandemic"

It's a weird thing to see a South Park episode that isn't quite sure what its doing. It usually doesn't happen that often. The specificity with which the show explores issues and the parodied manner in which they do so make it easy to identify that "Oh, this is an episode about homelessness in the style of a zombie movie", for example. Tonights episode, however, had no fucking clue what it was doing.

It started off with Stan noticing the increasing number of Peruvian Pan Flute bands popping up everywhere. He then notices how much money they make, and the boys naturally decide to start a Peruvian Pan Flute band of their own. Their promise to Craig that his investment in the band would yield profit, combined with the government's growing concern with the proliferation of pan pipe bands led me to believe it was going to be an episode about the US/global economic crash as a result of the faulty subprime mortgage system. I was wrong.

No, rather than go the economic crisis route, Stone and Parker went somewhere...different. The pan pipe bands are gathered to be deported, where they tell the guards that they are trying to protect them from "the Furry Death". Here, Stan's father's obsession with his new camcorder, established early in the episode, suddenly becomes our point of view and the episode turns into Cloverfield. Except instead of some half-seen unidentifiable monster, they chose to superimpose guinea pigs onto the streets of South Park. Carnage ensues, to be continued.

I wasn't disappointed with the new creativity of Stone and Parker, but rather, confused. It would be false to say that every episode has had some sort of social or political commentary, but every episode has at least held itself together in some sort of logical manner. Tonight's episode failed to do so. I had no idea where they were going with it, why they decided to mimick Cloverfield halfway through the episode, or what, if anything, they were trying to say. It just felt like a haphazard attempt at something. What that something was, though...who can say. Maybe next week's continuation will help clear things up.


C+

We'll Be Right Back

Hi Everyone,
Jon and I will be attending the CMJ Music Marathon in New York until Sunday, so there will be a brief break in posts. Don't worry though, come Sunday night, you'll get them all, albeit a little late. See you then!
Michael

Fringe - "The Cure"

This week's episode of Fringe was a study in contrast. On the one hand, the cold open was one of my favorite things I've seen on this show in a while. It was hardcore and shocking and disturbing in a way that most of the super-science hasn't been in a while.

But then we got into the episode proper and things kind of turned into Criminal Minds again. We got a lot more Olivia backstory this week and I don't want this to come off as callous, but it felt very been-there-done-that. Shooting her stepfather when she was young was, I imagine, quite a terrible moment. And the fact that the guy still sends her cards is messed up. But its the kind of messed up that every character on every crime show ever is.

I would have been willing to get over that, if we didn't then get a half hour of "Olivia Dunham is a cop who doesn't play by the rules." It means she gets results, Broyles! I am so sick of that storytelling archetype and especially here it just seemed so bland and uninspired. So what if Olivia doesn't care about bureaucracy because she's so devoted to justice? And so what if the system is too corrupt for her to work within it? And let's not forget how ridiculous some of the procedure in this episode was (how could they have ever gotten a warrant to search that place)

What's especially frustrating is that there was a lot to like in this episode. The scene between Peter and Nina was interesting, especially since they seem to have made the same arrangement that Walter had with the Observer. I also wonder if Massive Dynamics wasn't even more involved in the research than they let on, since it seems like if there's any major conglomerate getting involved in super-science, it would be MD.

But ultimately, I want to watch a TV show to see something that at least feels new. There is nothing inherently wrong with three-camera sitcoms or crime procedurals. But there is something very wrong with blandness and right now I can't think of a better word to describe Fringe.

C-

Gossip Girl - "Chuck in Real Life"

Hey, remember how Serena used to have a brother? No? Well he's back this week, with a new boyfriend who got a cursory mention. The true focus in Van Der Woodsen-land was on Lily, however, who attempted to make up for 17 years of absentee parenting by becoming Supermom. This seemed like the kind of storyline that I would get excited about, but for whatever reason I just wasn't feeling it. Part of the problem may be that this show doesn't really do earnest sincerity very well, but I think my bigger issue is that this storyline kind of came out of nowhere. Serena and Lily haven't been clashing very much recently, and they got over a lot of these issues in season one. More interesting to me is how out of control Serena seems to be getting. Going full Britney Spears seems a little beyond normal teenage rebellion (in all likelihood that was a joke, but it doesn't make Serena any more responsible). I'm not entirely clear on where they're taking her. Is Serena collapsing back to pre-season one Serena? It seems like it, but they're stopping short of turning her fully into a mean girl socialite. My question is why? It would change things up to make Serena the show's evil one for a while, but every time they try it, they always back off before she goes too far.

Meanwhile, in bromance world, Nate and Dan had their first fight when Dan saw the dire conditions Nate is living in. But one off-screen Humphreys guilt trip later, everything's okay and Nate has moved to Brooklyn. I liked the Dan/Nate friendship in theory (both of them are in dire need of something to do on this show), but in practice this episode just didn't work for me on that level.

Ah, but let's not forget about the episode's real A-story, as the Constance Billard Players decided to stage a revival of Cruel Intentions. Blair challenged Chuck to seduce Vanessa and in exchange, Chuck could have Blair. This was vintage, season one level evil calculation. So why wasn't it more fun? I think because it was all just too easy. Vanessa has seemed like a smart and capable girl, so I'd have thought it would take a little more effort for someone as irredeemably awful as Chuck to win her over. But apparently, buying her speakeasy was all it took. While there were three or four points where it seemed painfully obvious that everything from Chuck's bonding with the old speakeasy guy to the argument he had with Bart was part of his elaborate Chuck-plan for victory, but I was wrong. It turns out Vanessa's earnest Brooklynness melted the icy heart of Mr. Bass (if only a little), so Blair stepped in and put an end to the game herself before things went further between Chuck and Vanessa. Then Chuck turned the tables on Blair and tried to get her to admit she loves him.

Unlike most Gossip Girl fans, I can't say I'm rooting for Chair (you like that? I prefer it to Buck, although either way its pretty stupid) in the same way I'm rooting for, say, Robin and Barney. I think they're both too immature and destructive to really have something that would work (I picture any sort of future looking closer to Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf). But its hard to deny they're an interesting pairing.

So all in all, I still liked this. However, I liked it less than last week's which, thinking back on, I feel like I graded a little low. I just wish there was more than one interesting thing per week.

B-

How I Met Your Mother - "Shelter Island"

Ladies and gentlemen, the moment we've all been waiting for...Ted's marriage to Stella!

....oh wait. Jason Jones got the girl. Thats right, Stella's not the mother. Gasp!

To recap: Stella's sister was about to get married. Her husband ditched her, so Ted and Stella decide to take the wedding instead, rather than let thousands of dollars in reservations go to waste. But then the age old question arises, invite the ex's or not? Both Robin and Tony (Stella's almost-husband, Lucy's father) end up at the wedding, but when Ted and Stella go to confront them, Stella ends up running off with Tony.

For a plot that sounds somewhat contrived, this episode was surprisingly satisfying on an emotional level. The episode had laughs, of course (see: Barney's planning session on how to sleep with Robin again) but the overall feel of the episode was a much more personal, emotional one. Cobie Smulders (Robin) delivered what I felt to be her best performance yet in her speech to Ted. The writing felt very real, not overly melodramatic, and the delivery was heartfelt.

I'm happy to see that the writers have found a good balance of humor and heart for the show. Shows are always much more satisfying when you can have an actual emotional investment in the characters. I couldn't have been more proud of Barney for finally going for the belt.

A

Heroes - "Dying of the Light"

After last week's stupid stupid episode, this week's was much better. Sure there were weak points and it wasn't held together too tightly, but for the most part, it was well rounded and set up a great cliff hanger for next week.

Let's start with the Bennetts plus Meredith. Meredith was trapped in the clutches of the uber-creepy Eric Doyle in his magic land of muscle control. Momma Bennett felt the completely irrational need to come with her daughter on a rescue mission and it ended up being a stupid idea, as was easily guessed. A drawn out game of roulette was what happened next, with the again predictable ending of Claire getting shot and surviving so that she could take down the bad guy. A cold conversation with Noah and we were done with one of the weaker parts of the episode.

While we're on plotlines stuck on the a train to nowhere, let's talk about Nathan, Tracy and Mohinder. There was almost nothing to this at all. Nathan and Tracy showed up hoping to get a cure, Mohinder poisoned them, and then Tracy got out and then Mohinder threw a table and said something lame. I'm finding it hard to care about this thread. Please Heroes writers, do this better.

Alight, bad stuff out of the way, let's talk about what was good. The Patrelli Family Reunion went a little haywire tonight. Mamma is still in a coma and Peter was lashing out at his new brother for even thinking that he was really part of the family, despite Sylar's best intentions. Peter's reunion with his dad wasn't good either, as Papa stole all of Peter's powers. I liked where the plot is going, but I must say that having Peter and Sylar trade roles has been weird. I like Gabriel (AKA Good Sylar) but Hungry Peter is annoying. He was the only optimistic character of Season 1, and his turnaround is frustrating.

Hiro and Ando were pretty good tonight. Hiro's manipulation of time at the beginning was predictable (I think I see a trend), but turned out was just a set-up for a great gag. When he was looking for African Isaac (or AI as he will hence be known thanks to Hiro), Hiro though he could use his powers to grab him, but just got whacked with a shovel. This was only mildly funny until he hatched a plan to again use his powers and was once again knocked out. It looks like he's going to help AI get the bad guys, so he'll be a double agent for the villains, after being recruited by an increasingly disillusioned Daphne.

As for our favorite speedster, she met a turtle toting Parkman who was trying, very creepily, that to convince her they were soul mates. She left him briefly to recruit more people for Papa Patrelli which led her to try and convince Sylar, let out the guy from the Wire, and scold Mohinder for putting Maya in a cocoon. I like that while they have some Heroes turning into Villains, she seems like a Villain going Hero, which is great because she's an awesome character. I think this show has underplayed all of it's love lines from the very beginning, so I'd like to see this played up. Who knows, maybe Parkman and Daphne are the next Jim and Pam....probably not.

While I poked a lot of holes in this episode, I still feel like overall, it was very entertaining and did a good job of continuing to put the dominoes in place. Next week, we'll be picking sides in the Patrelli family squabble, so we'll see how that goes.

B

Mad Men - "The Mountain King"

So Don Draper had a wife too. And we now know that she's the same person who our Don sent the copy of Meditations in an Emergency to. I thought this week was a little more on the nose than we've seen out of the show normally (and certainly a great deal more than last week's endlessly awesome and bizarre episode), but I still liked it a lot more than others.

I think my biggest problem was that, while the stuff with Anna was interesting and necessary, it was kind of a chore to get through, especially given that Don was missing out on the action at Sterling Cooper. I recognize that for story reasons, they wanted to take Don out of there while the merger went through, but it was still very frustrating. I liked the flashbacks a great deal more than the real time action (especially that first one), but I can understand feeling a little force-fed.

For me, the most interesting action happened back in New York, with the contrasting paths of Peggy and Joan coming into direct focus. Starting with Joan, who was in pretty much the hardest scene to watch this show has done. Her assault really put into focus what a true asshole that doctor is. Joan's getting older and, sadly, there don't seem to be any options left for her. The shot of Joan's dead eyes staring at the furniture has to be one of the saddest things I've seen on this show. Looking at the blank trappings of the office orthodoxy, you can see the realization hit her that because of the values of society, there's no way out for her. The Mad Men society has reduced Joan to just another piece of furniture. And then, to add insult to injury, she finds Peggy moving into the office next to Don. That conversation was probably the high point of the episode, highlighting Peggy's status as a sort of bizarro Joan. Peggy rejected the notion that women are simply objects and somehow managed to get her own office. Joan may be able to pretend she's excited and happy about marriage, but secretly its her who's envious of Peggy's life.

And then there was Pete, whose marital problems seem to be coming to a head. I'm not sure how this is all going to shake out, and I thought for sure Peggy was going to come clean with him at the end there. Alas, it was not to be, although their scene was all kinds of awesome. There was also Betty who had her moment of growing up in yet another not-very-subtle moment in this episode. I felt sorry for the daughter though.

So that's where we stand as we head to the finale. Given how great this season has been, I'm sure the finale will rock hard. Its kind of sad to see such an outstanding run coming to an end.

B+

P.S. The good news is that the show has been renewed for another season. The bad news is that Matthew Weiner hasn't signed on for that season yet. I'm sure AMC won't let him go though.

Truthful Tv Title Cards

This is pretty awesome.

The Office - Baby Shower

Tonight's episode of The Office wasn't as funny as it could be, but it was a good episode for our characters. I feel like while tonight didn't have the laughs, it definitely advanced the story and gave hardcore Office fans the stories they've wanted.

First off was the Michael-Jan-Holly triangle, which I think was fantastic. The writers last season made Jan crazy, and this season, she's still crazy, but a tad bit more down to earth. I was so glad that Michael's craziness finally subsided and he decided that Jan "short changed" him, which was good to see. Jan's control over Michael was funny at first, then it got weird, then it got really sad. Also, Amy Ryan's ability to show Holly's true sadness at Michael's forced insults and then her happiness when he hugs her is phenomenal. I'd love to see her stay on the show because she and Michael are the new Pam and Jim and it's one of the most compelling parts of the show now.

As for the rest of the show, Jim and Pam's engagement hasn't changed the fact that there distance has been hurting them, which seems to have Office fans on the edge of their seat. Andy and Angela still are on the path to destruction. Dwight tested out Jan's baby carriage in a fashion remincent of his inspection of David's house in Season 3. Like I said, tonight was not a killer episode, but it addressed some things that needed to be addressed, which was great.

B

Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia - "Paddy's Pub: The Worst Bar in Philadelphia"

If I'm ever missing for an extended period of time, we now know that its likely because Josh Schwartz and the Gossip Girl writing crew has me taped to a chair somewhere.

All in all, it was a funny premise, but I didn't there were any truly hilarious moments. After receiving a bad review, the gang goes to visit the critic, which naturally ends in kidnapping. While Mac and Charlie try to take him to bathroom, Dennis and Dee go to his apartment in an attempt to cover their tracks, but of course they only end up kidnapping another person and locking him in the truck with the keys.

It all sounds very funny, but actually watching the episode, it was depressingly short on laughs. The only moments that stand out in my mind are Mac's roundhouse kick and Charlie eating the urinal cake. The latter was especially awesome for Charlie's commitment to continuing eating it, after Mac tells him not to, so he doesn't look stupid.

One of the big problems tonight was Frank's mysterious absence, making this the second episode this season without Danny DeVito. I think the idea of kidnapping would play in well to Frank's sketchy, criminal sensibilities (he is the muscle, after all). Without him, the balance of the episode seemed a little off.

My other problem was how easy everything resolved itself. Giving the other guy the Blueray (nice product placement) and the TV was convenient enough, but having the critic write another article in the paper about them, rather than pressing charges, felt forced. It may have even been funnier to just have Charlie's plan work (if only because Charlie's plans NEVER work). I'd have prefered some other, third option, but regardless, I understand that it was going to be hard to find a way out of this situation, but it sort of felt like they just gave up.

C+

Fringe - "Power Hungry"

So after a much needed hiatus, Fringe is back, news that I can only greet with my most ambivalent meh. Two weeks ago, if you can remember that far back, we got our first insights into the big picture, thanks to a bald guy known only as The Watcher (did you catch his appearance this week?).

If I may digress, there's an interesting debate going on on the AV Club's Fringe recaps right now over the inherent value of procedural shows compared to a more novelistic story telling approach. I agree with Noel, that a procedural show is not inherently bad, nor is a serialized show necessarily better (a fact that Heroes manages to prove weekly). Indeed, while its tough to argue with The Wire or Lost, the best approach may be something like The X-Files or Veronica Mars, that juggles elements of both.

However, I think that Fringe does have major problems, its just that everyone is misdiagnosing it. The problem is not its episodic nature, but the fact that for that style to work you need truly compelling characters, something this show just doesn't have yet. Don't get me wrong, I love Walter, but he's not yet big enough to carry the whole show, and they aren't really giving him any emotionally hefty stories. The same with Peter, he has a lot of unexplored potential, but contributes very little. And as for Olivia, I must go back to my earlier point: meh. Her whole thing with John continues to be quite boring, and she isn't an interesting enough character to carry the emotional weight of the show.

In fact, I almost wonder if Fringe would have been a stronger show if they had done without Olivia entirely, and simply made the Peter character recruited to the FBI by Broyles. I think making the show about a parent/child conflict would give us something tangible to hang our hats on, resolve a lot of the complaints about the show being just like The X-Files, and take the pressure off the mysteries.

I've been stalling the part where I get into this week's episode, mainly because I don't really know what to say. As always, we get a freak of the week who's a little misunderstood. As always, Walter finds some weird way to solve the mystery. The b-plot with the mysterious return on John seemed to add a couple of interesting ideas, namely the possibility that he may not have been the traitor that everyone thinks.

I think that the reason why everyone complains about the lack of a unifying storyline to the show is that there's currently nothing else to hold it together. The characters aren't interesting and the mysteries are redundant. Meanwhile, everyone keeps talking about the Pattern and indicating that there's some sort of larger plan. Its almost like Fringe wants us to be watching for the serialized elements, and then it gets snotty when we ask where those elements are. There's absolutely nothing that says that the reason we have to keep watching to show is to watch it tell one complete story. However, we do need to have some reason to keep watching. Right now, I'm not sure if I do.

C

Gossip Girl - "New Haven Can Wait"

Previously on Gossip Girl: Stuff happened. Seriously, it may just be the extra week off, but I can't remember one detail from the last episode. Its okay though, because none of it was really salient to this week.

Instead, the story featured the whole gang going to New Haven for Yale's perspective weekend - an interesting idea that could have led to some good developments. After becoming used to generally be in charge of everything, it would be interesting to see them getting a taste of being little fish in a massive pond. But this wasn't really that episode (and besides, given how obsessed this show is with these characters, I doubt they'll ever not be the center of the world) nor was it an especially interesting one.

The main action focused on Serena and Blair, who dueled for invitations to the Dean's party, a story that started well. The Blair/Serena conflict is an interesting one to me (as I write every week), but it seems like the show spends so much time telling us that they're at war without actually having them do anything. This week rectified that a little bit, but I think it was just doing too much. I was with it for the first half or so, which played like the college admissions version of The Prestige, with Serena the showwoman versus Blair the uncharismatic intellectual. I'll admit I was pulling for Blair (as always) and it was kinda heartbreaking when she didn't get into the Dean's party. But of course, she had a back up plan and was it a doozy. I think Blair bringing up Serena's having killed a guy last year to the whole party was quite possibly the nastiest thing I've seen the show done (and because I'm a sociopath, it was also one of my favorite moments of the season). What I liked about it was that Blair clearly crossed the line, but in a devious, evil way that was also completely believable and well within what we've seen her do before.

But then things got stupid again. The proceeding catfight out on the porch (the second such fight on Monday night, as fans of How I Met Your Mother remember) was predictable and tired (they've already done that a couple times before). I'm not going to complain about a catfight between Leighton Meester and Blake Lively, but what I will complain about is the rushed, now-we're-friends-again scenes that followed. Really? Blair brought up Serena's darkest secret to a room full of strangers and now everything's okay? Serena sabotaged Blair's lifelong dream and now everything's okay? This should have been a die-is-cast episode for a storyline that was just getting started. Instead, B and S have resolved their issues and are friends again? LAME

What else? Well, the Chuck-Nate bromance was threatened through a bonding experience between Nate and Dan that involved each assuming the others' identity. Nate did it first, to get with a girl without her knowing that he's the spawn of Yale's Most Wanted (the Captain). Despite being a TA for the English department, she seemed amused by Nate's vacant responses to her questions about Marquez and didn't really get wise until the real Dan Humphreys showed up at her door, thanks to his need to get a professor to read his work and write a recommendation. The whole Dan thing seemed pretty outlandish to me (why couldn't he just ask a professor? is that even really how it works at Yale? how much clout does English girl have in the department?) but whatever. And I'd like to say that I don't find it believable that she'd go with the boring nothing guy over the nice guy with common interests, but alas I find that all too believable.

In other news, Chuck acted like a douche for an hour, but his hilarious victory over Skull and Bones made it worth it (and I like that Dan is getting more story-time with Nate and Chuck). Meanwhile, Rufus continued his campaign for father of the year by letting Jenny drop out of school and pursue her fashion career. I think I may have misinterpreted this storyline as being about how hard a time Jenny was having at school, but instead it looks like it was just a vehicle to get her into fashion full-time. So now we have lots more made-for-TV-Devil-Wears-Prada action to look forward to. Yippy. And Lily earned herself a new nickname: Serena's Unidentified Friend (heretofore known as SUF).

I wouldn't call this episode an epic fail as much as a missed opportunity. It seems like there's so much more that could be done with a college visit (or for that matter, any of the storylines happening tonight), but we're consistently getting the least interesting outcomes out of each storyline (a problem this show is not unfamiliar with). If we're going to make this show about people who have Yale as a safety school, then let's go all the way with this. Unfortunately, each week makes me less and less convinced that this show can keep up the crazed, accidental levels of genius it was hitting in season one.

C

P.S. Does anyone think that picture is going to net us a few extra hits this week?

Edited to Add:

Apparently Dan and Serena are Obama supporters. Forget about Bill Ayers, this is the connection the McCain campaign should be running with: